The doggone sweetest sweet peppers that ever lived

(Not really, regarding the title of this post).

But I bought my latest dangerous food based on the marketing. Here’s what the package said:

Sweet twister

Sweet twister 2

First of all, any food that touts itself a contender for the top category spot for anything in the world is worthy of being cooked in this here blog space, in my opinion, even though peppers are far from being as odd as most foods I usually try (like kangaroo or fish heads or reindeer moss, just as three random examples). These peppers were different from regular peppers, and different is my specialty. I imagined some kind of Willy Wonka peppers, if they were the sweetest ever. The cotton candy of peppers, maybe.

Second of all, I enjoyed the wording on the packaging. I am currently taking a copyediting course (to make some beer money), which made me appreciate the sentence:

“Maybe the sweetest pepper in the world?”

Why the lack of confidence, pepper people? I’m guessing the bag started out saying, “The sweetest pepper in the world!” and the lawyers made them change it because they didn’t win the pepper Olympics. I say go ahead and name your product the sweetest in the world and use wording like this post’s title to shout it from the rooftops, even though it will make your lawyers and copy editors pee themselves with anxiety. If you’re not giving a lawyer a heart attack on a semi-regular basis, you’re just not pushing the envelope far enough, that’s what I say.

Except that in this case, the peppers were no sweeter than a regular old every-day sweet pepper, so their lawyers were right to tell them to proceed with caution.

But I made them into something good. And my son enjoyed using them for the following silly pepper photo shoot.

Silly peppers IMG_6478 IMG_6481 IMG_6483

I watched his poses with curiosity, wondering when he was going to do the inevitable male long pepper pose. I was so charmed when he didn’t do it, thinking, “Aw, my little four-year-old guy is too sweet to think that way.” Here was his second-last pose:

Belly button pepper

That’s his “belly button pose.” Again, I thought, “Awwww, my sweet little guy.” And then his last pose came, which I won’t post because it might be considered lewd. But let’s just say my angelic image of him was dashed and his gender finally confirmed.

But back to cooking. Barbecue weather is finally here, so I took a page from the Burger Nerd’s site and made sliders using his go-to burger recipe, with roasted sweet pepper mayonnaise to go with them (sort-of). I won’t recount Burger Nerd’s steps myself, but I will point out these important things:

– Chill the patties, then let them get luke a bit on the counter so that they stick together, but don’t stick

– Oil the grill

– Don’t manhandle the meat too much

– Salt the patties just prior to cooking

– Make a divot in the centre of each patty so that they don’t ball up when cooking

Raw sliders

As for the mayo, I tried to make it from scratch using hemp oil, but because you have to chill hemp oil it didn’t emulsify. New lesson for me: room temp oil and eggs work best for mayo, folks!

So I turned to my thighs’ good friend…

Mayo…roasted a sweet pepper (grill it directly, flipping a few times so that it’s black all over, then pop it into a bowl covered with saran which will make the skin easy to peel off).

Roasted pepper

Then whiz it in a food processor with 1/2C mayo, and you’re done!

I accompanied my sweet pepper mayo sliders with onions, pickles, and a greens salad (with the sweetest ever peppers), and voila.

Sliders

Lovely! The burgers were so perfect that my kids devoured a meal I made for once, and the mayo had the added sweetness of the sweetest peppers in the world. Perfect!

Question: Have you ever eaten a food that should be world champion of something?

 

Comments

  1. Leave a Reply

    Trevor "The Burger Nerd" Davis
    May 23, 2014

    Outstanding looking burger — And I’m not just saying that because you mentioned me ( btw, thanks for that) but I am saying it because that last pic just made my mouth water.

    I’ve seen those peppers before (Loblaws I think?) and might have to give them a try since now I know they live up to their modest claim of (perhaps) being the sweetest peppers in the world.

    And my condolences for finding out that your son will grow up to be like every other man and take any opportunity given to use vegetables as a source of penile comedy lol.

    Great looking burger – two thumbs up by The Burger Nerd 😉

    • Leave a Reply

      Ann Allchin
      May 23, 2014

      Phew! Your burgers are made with such TLC that I’m glad I didn’t “butcher,” your instructions. My burgers used to suck before you came along, so thanks!!

  2. Leave a Reply

    Aly
    May 24, 2014

    Those are huge peppers! I’m used to just seeing the bell ones, or the mini versions of what you have. Wow. Sweetest or not, still impressive. 🙂 I have never done mayo sauces like that, but it sounds good and I think the husband would go for it, too.

    • Leave a Reply

      Ann Allchin
      May 24, 2014

      Mayos of any kind are my friend. I probably could have thrown in some herbs too.

      And regarding size, isn’t it funny how for some veggies and fruits we like ’em big (for eating, not for boy photo shoots of course) and for others they need to be petite? Like did you know that baby carrots are usually big ones shaved down?

  3. Leave a Reply

    Mike @ Gentleman Homestead
    May 26, 2014

    I usually have some number of Pabsts in the beer fridge. America’s Best indeed and folks knew a great brew when they guzzled one in 1893. They’re due for another Blue Ribbon any day now.

  4. Leave a Reply

    Marni
    May 29, 2014

    Ummm Wow.. This looks super tasty! Love the idea of a mini burger…AND love that your kids ate it..

    • Leave a Reply

      Ann Allchin
      May 29, 2014

      Thanks! I find that mini burgers go down well for everyone, even if you need 5 of them!

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